WORKSHOP FOUR - LISTENING

RITUAL: Name tags/Handouts/Snack/Sit in a new seat

DISCUSSION: Talk about last week’s class
Do you feel you were more aware of verbal communication this past week ?

Let’s review a few of the points - which of these did you really try and work on this past week ? What happened ? At work with care receivers? with co-workers? at home? Was there anything that you didn’t understand or would like to expand upon?

ICEBREAKER: Pick one from my big list

DISCUSSION: Think of someone you really enjoy talking to . What are the qualities that draw you to speak with them ?

DID YOU KNOW ?
Thoughts move about four times as fast as speech.

1. If you are really listening intently, you should feel tired
   after your speaker has finished. Effective listening is an
   active rather than a passive activity.
2. When you find yourself drifting away during a listening
   session, change your body position and concentrate on using
   one of the above skills. Once one of the skills is being
   used, the other active skills will come into place as well.

• Hearing. Hearing just means listening enough to catch what the speaker is saying. For example, say you were listening to a report on zebras, and the speaker mentioned that no two are alike. If you can repeat the fact, then you have heard what has been said.
  
• Understanding. The next part of listening happens when you take what you have heard and understand it in your own way. Let's go back to that report on zebras. When you hear that no two are alike, think about what that might mean. You might think, "Maybe this means that the pattern of stripes is different for each zebra."
  
• Judging. After you are sure you understand what the speaker has said, think about whether it makes sense. Do you believe what you have heard? You might think, "How could the stripes to be different for every zebra? But then again, the fingerprints are different for every person. I think this seems believable."

HANDOUT for Communication: Listening Discussion (click for printable PDF)

1. Stop talking
   "I know this seems obvious, but there are some of that need reminding to be quiet. Let someone else do a little talking."
   
2. Eye contact
   "I have said this for the past 3 weeks and will continue to stand on my soap box and preach about the importance of eyes contact."
   
3. Active listening
   
   DISCUSSION :
   What are some traits of active listening ? People will usually say the following and you can fill in those that they do not bring up. Leaning forward, nodding, eye contact, empathetic responses, paraphrasing, asking questions, silence, touching.
   
   DISCUSSION: Explain what active listening is and have them pair off and practice.
   
4. Watching & listening with your whole being
   EXERCISE: Freeze Walk
   EXERCISE: Take a picture it lasts longer
   
5. Listening to their non verbal communication.
   * Remind them that we don't just need to be aware of our non-verbal communication but those we are caring for. They are communicating to us through their non-verbal communication.
   
6. Concentration. Focus
   EXERCISE: Simultaneous Conversation
   
7. Be patient.
   Let the speaker finish speaking & let yourself finish listening before speaking.
   EXERCISE : Count to 5
   
8. Don’t interrupt; give them time to say what they are trying to say.
   EXERCISE : Circle story
   EXERCISE : Line story 9.
   
9. If the speaker is having difficulty finding words you can help them find a word - just make sure you found the correct word.
   EXERCISE: Hesitation
   
10. Understanding the intent. double-check the meaning.
    EXERCISE: Gibberish slips of paper
    EXERCISE: Gibberish interpreter
    
11. Be ready for outbursts when listening. Be calm.
    
    "I know it happens to me. You are tired at the end of the day and talking about where you need to stop on the way home and you say, (I say this to someone in the workshop)‘ Before I go home I have to stop at the ...you know...it’s right on the way...c’mon you know what I am saying right? Ugh !!!!! ‘ It’s frustrating to us and normally we can finally find the word. Just imagine how it feels to have this happen to you constantly. I don’t blame anyone for getting frustrated. I would."
    
12. Empathize with the person. Understand another's feelings.
    EXERCISE: Mirror emotions
    
13. Use your knowledge about the person to help you understand; when listening and when they are having difficulty speaking.
    
14. Listening fully gives respect and power to both the speaker and listener.
    
15. Silence. A good listener is comfortable with silence.
    Silence makes people uncomfortable. It is filled with thought, and sometimes pain. Too often people are afraid to wait out the silence and jump in to fill it up with words. A good listener is comfortable with silence, and knows that it can bear much emotional fruit. Sometimes waiting out several minutes of silence will give the speaker a chance to dig deep for a much needed insight.
    Mastering the silence is an important achievement.

EXERCISE: So What You Are Saying is...

EXERCISE: Gibberish Intent (click for printable PDF file)

EXERCISE: Gibberish interpreter

EXERCISE: Gibberish/English

EXERCISE: A What?

CLOSER: I like to end this class with a few moments of silence.
Otherwise look through the closers

EVALUATION: Fill out one page evaluation (click for printable PDF file)

HOMEWORK : Look over your handouts and which of these apply to you?
Which one can you focus on for this next week?

One of the best ways to persuade others is with your ears—by listening to them.
~ Dean Rusk

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